Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Interesting Trader Joe's Encounter

I have always loved Trader Joe's (TJs)- the produce is fresh, the meat is happy, the aisles have rows upon rows of interesting non modified products, which is always changing, and the people are progressive- intelligent consumers and friendly helpful staff; at least that has been my experience and my perception. So when I politely and kindly offered my services to a woman who was struggling with her groceries I was quite taken aback by her gruff resounding NO!

The Scene: I was filled with excitement at being in TJs (food makes me happy) and even though I was only picking up a few items I wanted to give the wonderful goodness that is found within the walls of TJs my full attention so I was standing off to the side responding to some very persistent texters so I could proceed with my culinary journey. As I am sending my responses I notice a woman coming towards me who is struggling with a small 'granny cart' overflowing with goods and two armfuls of boxed berries- she obviously needed help. Being the kind person that I am I offered to help her with her parcels because I could see if she ventured any further up the aisle in her current state innocent bystanders may have been assaulted with berry pulp.
photo credit: kobochangirl-aka

Not looking me in the eye she replied very curtly, 'No'. Generally I respect a person's right to say no...no means no...however, she was clearly in need and I persisted against what I thought was her stubbornness and asked if she was sure she didn't need help, 'No!' again, this time a bit more forceful. So I backed off and resumed the task at hand but I just couldn't help watching in awe as this same woman who refused to accept help from me practically pleaded with a young man to help her with her packages because she just didn't know how she was going to make it up to the front of the store to the line with all of her stuff.

'Thats interesting' I said, more to myself than to anyone else, 'what?' she replied 'but you didn't want me to help you'I said still in shock. 'No!' she said and shuffled away with her ignorance and food items.

I was so taken aback and did not quite know how to wrap my mind around it- I found a similarly complected person and described the scenario to see if anyone else thought it odd that someone in 2012 would turn down the help of another even of a different skin color. The kind woman with whom I spoke told me that 'I knew what that was' and gave me a knowing look- but I wondered as I thanked her and walked away 'Do I know what that was?'

What she was implying was that I had had a first-hand encounter with racism and I suppose I am still trying to wrap my head around a concept I have always had trouble understanding: treating someone different or judging them based on their color or how they look alone and it did not seem to matter that I was dressed nice and was offering a kindness...

That was interesting

CL

What Say YOu?

2 comments:

  1. I believe these things will always exist in our society. It may not always manifest the way it did for you on that day but it is often there. I doubt that even my daughter's grandchildren will be completely free of these experiences. At least in today's society it is less tolerated than say 31 years ago.

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    1. I dare say that I agree with you however it still saddens me as it seems that we will never understand that we are all one in search of the same thing although the form may be different...

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