An Ode to Underwear

I have long noted the trend of baggy saggy clothes- generally on young (and not so young) men sometimes on women as well but mostly with the young men. With the baggy saggy clothes comes somewhat of a 'peep show' if you will of boxers and boxer briefs in an assortment of colors and patterns.

Here's the thing- I'm noticing that baggy pants are out...the alternative is the more fitted slim cut skinny jean (for men...'skater look')...that still sag. So these young people are going into stores, spending money on pants that fit (sometimes too small for beefier adolescents), only to force them to sag...I simply do not understand this phenomena.

So walking down the street at any given time I and everyone else in the world knows what color your delicates are. Just in case no one has said it out loud: "its not sexy!" Clothes and fashion are infamous for being one of the vehicles of self expression- but what is the message? and who is it for? (And I would like to know who started this ridiculous 'trend'..was it CrissCross? Rage with her Afro Puffs? Surely the 'Gangsta' rappers had something to do with it...but fitted jeans that you have to force to sag...really?!)

Surely these young ones cannot think this is appropriate? I have it on good authority that young men take as much time if not more time than females dressing and preening themselves before they leave the house and it has to be one of the most uncomfortable looking trends to date so it must be a conscious decision...but WWWWHHHHYYYYY?

Certainly some of the young ladies walking around are no better - but their motive is clear- over-sexualized attire has the "benefit" of increased attention from the opposite sex- I don't agree with it but I get it. However, the choice of young men everywhere to choose to walk around with their boxers or briefs (sometimes color coordinated with their outfit) bunched up over the waist of their pants baffles me.


I won't get into the implications for job interviews or classroom etiquette as I believe it is evident, however, there is clearly a missing link - some missing guidance that is desperately needed and might I add as a member of this society I think I speak for a pretty large number when I say emphatically that, "no one wants to see your underwear! Plus it's really obvious that its hard for you walk, not to mention they have done medical research which shows you are throwing your hips out of joint...or something unnatural like that!"

Live Your Best Life (which can be done without showing the world your underoos)
CL

What Say You?

Make Time for Laughter

Photo Credit: sayyestotennis.com

A recent non assuming trip to south street with my Twin Soul (Twin) for a bite to eat turned into perhaps one of the longest laugh-a-thons in history (well mine anyway).

The Scene:
After supporting my Twin in her latest venture (healthy weight loss)- listening to a delightful petite woman, her daughter quietly by her side, share her weight loss story with a group of attentive weight loss hopefuls (side note: the subject is of no interest to me but I think I would sit through a lecture on the molecular structure of an atom if she asked me too- such is our relationship), sampling weight loss smoothies and snack bars and observing with amusement how effective stories really are at selling products- it was finally over and the real fun could begin!

We had no plan (we generally don't) but we had a mission: to find and consume some real food (usually the precipice to all of our adventures). A suggestion was made regarding an 'underground' food joint on south street that served the most delectable chicken kabobs in South Philly...and off we went- following a caravan of hungry soon-to-be-dieters off to south street, my Twin and I chit chatted about this or that, trying to distract ourselves from the hunger pains racking our bellies.

10 minutes later we joined a small group of her friends and family, ordered, and waited for our sustenance to arrive. There was a jovial attitude in the group, made more so once my Twin and I decided what we were going to eat, and it was fun listening to this inter-generational group of women dialogue with each other.

Photo Credit: panhala.net

As our cheese steak and kabobs came steaming to the table (don't judge us :) ) and we split each dish so we could satisfy both of our cravings, the stories became nostalgic as the older women reminisced about the days gone by and their school day mishaps- our laughter lit up the small narrow food joint but we cared not...we were in good company and the food was equally amazing (for an 'underground food joint in S.P.'). 

When we had had our fill of food and laughs we said our goodbyes and ventured out onto the street to enjoy the summer evening air- this time joined by a mutual friend and her ridiculously adorable pint sized daughter who is just learning to put sentences together. Needless to say our small group of 3 1/2 evolved as the hours rolled by to a sizable group of  8 1/2 and the most memorable part of the night: the laughter!

We laughed at ourselves, people, society, everything- we laughed so hard we cried, our breath got caught in our chest and our guts ached. It was good belly laughter- profound in its innocence and powerful because we were sharing it- in some cases with strangers.

Photo Credit: Sound of Laughter-Hersley

Our fun kept us out until dawn, no one really wanting to let go of this treasure we had haphazardly discovered; leading us to a very early breakfast at a local diner where the laughter continued- now tinged with fatigue and hunger(again) but still equally good.

There are many things that take place in our lives- hiccups and hangups but what I realized is that laughter (and love) really is the best medicine & sometimes the most memorable moments are those that are unplanned and spontaneous


Live Your Best Life
CL

What Say You?

Vintage Culture

In a grip of nostalgia, yearning for something wholesome and good, I found some episodes of one of America's favorite families- The Huxtables.

As I sat watching the growing pains & the everyday life events of Rudy, Theo, Vanessa, Olivia, Denise, Sandra, Claire, HeathCliff, both sets of grandparents, & friends I reflected on the times we now find ourselves in and the land from whence we came not so long ago.

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

Our entertainment is a reflection of our society- today we are surrounded by sex, drugs and violence; not that these things have not held us hostage since the beginning of time but something has changed. Sexual and violent images have gotten bolder pushing the limits of acceptability in movies, tv shows, within song lyrics to down right vulgarity; the drugs of today are chemical compounds that have unheard of and unparalleled affects on the ingestors and are even perhaps untraceable by the standards of our drug testing systems. Even our "news programs" are only glorified scripted advertisements shocking us into new products because the stories told to us play on our insecurities and fears.

Perhaps what is most shocking of all is our apparent need for this hyper stimulation. As a child I was content with a few coloring books, dolls and books; on a sunny summers day you could find me racing down the street on my bike or roller blades or on my belly studying the patterns of ants trying to figure out how they found their way home. Today's child must have constant external stimuli- cell phones, video games, ipods, ipads, wii and who knows what else- they are disconnected from the world around them, the line between reality and fiction are becoming blurred as they careen down into twisted worlds of fantasy except the damage that is being done is real and cannot be undone by hitting the 'previous' button on the remote or the 'reset' button on a console. 

Lives are shattering, somewhere during our cultural "evolution" we lost our moral fibers, we are losing our children at an alarming rate and as a species in large part we ourselves are lost and know not where to turn. We have lost our capacity to feel and therefore seek greater and greater risk, we forget to acknowledge that our actions not only help or hinder us but have far reaching effects on others. We dismiss acts of violence as 'senseless' but perhaps it is time to take a deeper look and uncover the 'sense' so we can stop what is happening to our world- only by facing what ails us can we begin to heal.

Watching the Cosby Show did something for my soul- I laughed, I cried, I reflected but most of all I was urged to action. We all have the power to touch the lives of others, to give a kindness, to teach there is a different way, to reflect in our own lives what we wish the world to be. It takes time, patience and courage but I must remain hopeful that it can be done- even if just one life is touched perhaps that is enough.

"Only you can prevent forest fires"
Smokey the Bear

CL

What Say YOu?

Its Not Me....Its You

Apparently I have missed the memo that informed me that 1. it is ok to tell people (strangers that you just meet that look suspicious- don't ask how I end up in conversations with said people...) exactly where you live 2. It is normal to ride off into the sunset with afore mentioned strangers to an unknown location with an unknown time or arrival or return & 3. I am obligated to marry you even though we just met, you are missing your teeth and we obviously have very little in common, except of course for our general skin tone.

I have noticed that men (generally) are drawn to my positive spirit, which is fine. I have also noticed that some men want to immediately attach themselves to me because of said spirit, a little less fine but tolerable. However, when I politely smile and shake my head and inform them that what they desire (the list is long ranging from soul mate to casino buddies) will never happen with me (I do give them encouragement and let them know that there are plenty of women they may have a chance with...I'm just not one of them) I notice an indignant change in disposition, followed by ... reproach: not fine.

I have been told quite frankly that I am being too cautious (I also feel like they want to say 'stuck up'- except I'm not so they cant quite find the correct descriptive for my "unruly" behavior) when I have refused to let someone know my full name, my full address, and my date of birth. In a world where rape and murder are prominent I am being too cautious.

I have had to remind strangers that we have known each other for all of 5 minutes and the soul mate button they are trying to pin on me is not the right fit for me- it does not seem to matter that my interests are light years away that my perception of the world around me is different than the average Jane's...sigh...the only thing that matters is their projections.

I am apparently not playing by the rules- is it perhaps because I speak when spoken to (I have always found that ignoring someone was very rude), because I do not avert eye contact (that's another thing! I have to constantly remind people that someone in their lives taught them it is impolite to stare), because I stop and smell the flowers, because I generally appear to be a nice person?

Well I am a nice person but that doesn't mean that I don't have standards or dreams and desires of my own and a very acute sense of what and is close or not to fulfilling them- some folks may catch me off guard but even those sneaky ones get rooted out if they do not belong when I am fully cognizant of the situation. Just because I'm nice (mostly) doesn't mean everybody can fly- I don't care about what car you drive or how much money you say your willing to spend (I call their bluff every time) I care about the things that you cannot show off in a traditional way, "the content of your character" is where the meat is.

And even still! You may be a wonderful person and we may not be right for each other (especially if you have 7 kids and most of your teeth are missing from your mouth...REALLY...wake up!)

SIDENOTE: I once got hit on by an older gentleman recently who after trying to guilt then bribe me into a conversation to no avail whispered in my ear, "Don't let the oxygen tank fool you honey, I am more than capable" I cannot make this stuff up! I kindly informed him that that was no way to talk to a lady and I was shocked and appalled that he had even twisted his lips to say such a thing...he then made some feeble attempts to clean it up and quietly made his exit. SMH

I don't know if I will ever cease to be amazed at the audacity of others who insist on forcing you into their fantasyland with little to no consideration for your willingness to go/participate.

Very Interesting

CL

What Say You?

Crouching Tyger Hidden Lilly

I first must give a huge thank you to my Chocolate Bunny (insider) for such a wonderful title!

Tyger Lilli

I have two cats. Tyger Lilli & Lilly. They are unrelated and at times have difficulty relating to each other and they couldn't be more different. I was bamboozled by Tyger Lilly to bring her home when she was 6 months old and living in an animal shelter (she is quick witted, mischievous, has a an interesting sense of humor and an affinity for bacon and fried chicken); a year later I thought (foolishly) that she was lonely and needed a companion as I was frequently not home attending to my life beyond my four walls.

 I found a picture of Lilly hanging on a utility pole one day while I was out and immediately felt my heartstrings tug as I read about her rescue from the streets, her difficult birthing of kittens when she was still just a kitten herself and the fact that the woman who rescued her could not keep her for fear that her 5 cats (yes 5) would beat her up...or something like that.

Lilly

I made plans to meet Lilly and her present owner soon thereafter and was taken aback as I witnessed the most scared animal I had ever come across. Not to mention Lilly's living arrangements were a bit questionable- the woman's house was very clean but she kept Lilly sequestered away from the other cats in a tiny bathroom where I presume she ate, slept, and relieved herself- the only contact she had with others was about once or twice a day when the owner would go in door closed and spend time petting her and talking with her, I raised an eyebrow at the description of Lilly's life. I do believe the woman had good intentions and thought that Lilly's isolation was necessary for her own safety, however, that left any new owner with quite an interesting task (as I would learn first hand) anyhoo in spite of Lilly's downright nasty disposition (clinically I knew that fear many times manifests itself as anger and aggression although I had up until this point only encountered this phenomena with people, I was undeterred) I figured Lilly needed a loving home, space, and I must admit I had fantasized about her and Tyger Lilli becoming the best of friends...you know...like in the YouTube videos and those cutesy emails.

Think again genius!(is what I said to myself many times over) Upon entering her new home Lilly promptly found the stairs ran up them found a corner and hid in it, all before Tyger Lilli got a chance to introduce herself or I was able to give her the grand tour. When we finally located our new addition she was shaking like a leaf and hissing...after speaking in loving tones for a few minutes and being met with more hissing, I informed her matter of factly that this was her home now and she should get used to it (funny I never thought about taking her back)

Fast Forward to present day (two or three years since her first day) it has been an interesting dynamic to watch unfold. Lilly is actually a very affectionate cat but it took me at least a year to find that out and she is just beginning to find new places to hide although she still has not ventured down the stairs...ever. As for her relationship with Tyger Lilli - it too is evolving and I am noticing that when I am home Tyger Lilli (who acts more like a dog than a cat most of the time) will split her time between me and Lilly- I have even caught them just hanging out together in their room...all peaceful like.

So the saga continues but at least it seems to have been one of healing, learning to trust again and friendship- the ups and the downs. Perhaps they will have their YouTube moment after all. One can dream...


CL

What Say YOu?

ChristyLove & The Woodsman Part I

For those who are like me and do not believe in coincidences and similarly believe that the Creator works in wonderful and mysterious ways generally we are prone to look at the world around us, the experience, and the people we meet a little differently.

I have been consciously paying attention to 'messages' from the Universe/Creator in a sincere effort to better understand the world I live in and to perhaps better understand how to move 'appropriately' through my life. This life, I have come to believe is an interactive process- if we are open to the experience and willing to trust our Spirit (The God Within). A few years ago I took stock of where I was in life- more so emotionally and I did not particularly like what I saw. In true Christy fashion- I decided to change it- little did I know that my teeny tiny decision would whisk me away on a path filled with happiness love and gratitude. I have gone places I couldn't have predicted I would go and the people that have filled my life from this point to that are truly amazing (some are new editions others have come back into my life for various reasons- some have not stayed long, but those who have I am eternally grateful for the reunions)

The biggest thing that I have learned is that someone or something is always trying to give us information, or lessons/messages if you will, to aide us along our journey- our job is to pay attention and interpret them however we need to so that our journey may continue. I generally take whatever signs I see/find rather lightly but I do notice them and I do take the time to try and understand them. Dreams are perhaps the Universe's favorite playground so I have taken steps to understand them on a deeper level but I have also found that creatures from the animal kingdom also carry messages for us with them, also "random" meetings or conversations you have with others (particularly strangers) serve as very interesting fodder indeed.

This has been a longer intro than intended however perhaps it was needed- leading me to the point of this post: an encounter. I most also note that for the past few months I have been followed around by a white butterfly (possibly the spirit of my father) and in general have been bombarded with butterfly encounters, sometimes in the most unlikely of places i.e. in an indoor gymnasium a beautiful butterfly found its way to my leg and rested there quite comfortably for a few moments then fluttered away never to be seen again...

The Scene:

photograph by: ChristyLove

A warm sunny June afternoon I was taken to an unknown place by a person with whom I was becoming acquainted. The place turned out to be Ridley State Park and the person turned out to be The Woodsman (self proclaimed). I was already enthralled with the peace and tranquility of the sun dappled trail alongside the gurgling of the creek. The Woodsman explained that this was one of his favorite secret places and I was the first he had shared it with (if it was a line I didn't care, too distracted was I by the moss covered stones and how closely the thick exposed tree roots resembled human nerves) as we continued along the path I noticed not one not two but at least five butterflies swirling around us and through us as we walked and talked. Then one of the most spectacular things happened: once the butterflies had our attention one flitted to the ground...waiting? Wings stretching but not moving...beside me I noticed the Woodsman softly approaching the grounded animal and without a word on bended knee he PICKED UP the butterfly- who casually assumed a comfy spot on the outstretched finger. The Woodsman proceeded to bring the butterfly over to where I was standing with baited breath and he encouraged me to try and hold the butterfly...close but no cigar...in the midst of the transfer the butterfly took to the sky once more bidding us ado.

Anyone who knows me knows that I have developed a kindred spirit with the Earth, a reverence and respect for this place which we call home and I have a deeply felt responsibility to protect it but even I have not come so close with the wildness of nature as I witnessed on this day. That has only happened in Disney movies and with wranglers who have enslaved wild beasts or doped them up (which doesn't count in my book) so to say the least I was intrigued by this being who dubbed himself the Woodsman and apparently speaks butterfly- but I kept my intrigue carefully couched in questions about said persons upbringing and background making mental notes about his character all the while.

Thats nice dear you may be saying but! There is more! I have noted that on all of our outings, especially to these special places of the Woodsman's we have encountered very interesting dynamics in the animal kingdom: a bird playing tag with a squirrel among the treetops (we stood and watched for at least 20 minutes until the bird gave up and the squirrel breathed a sigh of relief) and a momma turtle laying eggs in the earth (we thought she was dead until we saw her back legs moving and white eggs being plopped out and into the hole she had carved out of the mud) to name a few.

Now all of this may mean very little but each animal that we encountered has a symbolic meaning which I will share in another post...so stay tuned

hmmph...that was interesting

CL

What Say YOu?